Sunday Morning Sex

[LadyChauffer]

I will never hear church bells ringing again without smiling.
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95-year-old grandmother and comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.
"Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong."
She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along.

[Scary Guy]

Stupid icecream man, working on the sabbath like that. We should stone him to death!

32And while the children of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man who gathered sticks upon the Sabbath day.
33And those who found him gathering sticks brought him unto Moses and Aaron and unto all the congregation.

34And they put him under guard, because it was not declared what should be done to him.

35And the LORD said unto Moses, "The man shall be surely put to death. All the congregation shall stone him with stones outside the camp."

36And all the congregation brought him outside the camp and stoned him with stones, and he died, as the LORD commanded Moses.

I know, I'm a dick.

[LadyChauffer]

lol!

[LadyChauffer]

meltingicecreamtruck.jpg
or you could just torch it.

[Scary Guy]

Not if it's one of these awesome trucks. List is on your left

http://www.mortiscity.com/media/gallery/index.php?Qwd=./other_cars/actual_cars/eye-scream_trucks&Qiv=name&Qis=M#qdig

[LadyChauffer]

Not if it's one of these awesome trucks. List is on your left

http://www.mortiscity.com/media/gall...ame&Qis=M#qdig

very nice.

[jlprigmore]

If it weren't for all the bible thumpers making people work on sundays by going out to eat and taking sunday drives and doing their sunday shopping after their little b.s. sessions performed by greedy bastards who take their money and tell them to believe in imaginary friends, we'd all probably have sundays off.
But on a lighter note that was a pretty damn good joke!

[Highbars]

after their little b.s. sessions performed by greedy bastards who take their money and tell them to believe in imaginary friends,

You don't need to go to church to share your wealth with the Lord... Just gather all your available cash stand in the middle of the room...Toss it in the air and he will take what he needs and whatever hits the floor you can keep.... Thank you Jesus, Thank you Lord

[LadyChauffer]

Well said. And that is why I am Pagan.